Philambivalence
I love Philly. I hate Philly. It's an ambivalence I've become comfortable with during the time I've been here.
Philly is my bitch, my dawg, my lover, my child, my parent, my pimp. I've been educated, miseducated and re-educated within these borders... and beyond them.
To really appreciate Philadelphia's nuances and idiosyncrasies you've had to have lived elsewhere. Actually, "eslewheres." It's highly recommended by this observer that "elsewheres" include locales "better" than, as well as "worse" than Philadelphia. In order to tolerate this city you need a thick skin, eyes in the back of your head and a sense of humour (irony), and an appreciation for various degrees of drama.
Philly is equal parts book knowledge, street wisdom and good old-fashioned bullshit. Often at odds, the three often collide leaving common sense in a coma.
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"Philly is my bitch!"
Philly is greedy, hostile, fat and blighted. It's an old city strategically placed between the capital of the world (NYC) and the nation's capital (DC). It's an area loaded with potential, however it's a metropolitan "Gilligan" (always on the verge of becoming a World Class City, and always something incredibly stupid happens to hold it back).
It's "The Place That Loves You Back," which implies that you must love Philly first. Like a gold digger, Philly will love you if you shoot a film here, buy a vacant mall and build a hotel on the site, hold your convention here, open a yupscale restaurant or develop the waterfront. Then, this place will love you so much, it's almost criminal.
Just don't be homeless, an activist, mentally ill, controversial, outspoken or a member of a radical fringe group. No love here for yous guys.
"We have our share of political fiascos..."
Still, there's something especially charming about this place that I can't quite pinpoint. There must be. Maybe it's the weather, the lack of natural disasters. Floods, earthquakes, tornados, hurricanes avalanches are practically unheard of here. We do, however have our share of political fiascos, social disasters and fiscal shenanigans.
Perhaps the reason I've remained here has more to do with the challenge, the mental toughness it takes to deal with a place like Philly. Or maybe it's because the City is holding my family hostage.
Whatever my excuse, here I am. It looks like I am going to be here for a few more years. No matter how much I bitch and how many "Hostility" awards the city wins, being here is working out for me.
Come and visit. Enjoy our history, our great restaurants, or energetic nightlife, our friendly natives (Pssst, watch you back... ha ha ha, just kidding.)
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